Monday, July 26, 2010

Pentel? ...Not so Bad!

This pen was robust and solid.  Our FSRI pen-testing division used one pen to write 4532 "old school" hand-written termination letters and found it more than adequate in "getting the point across."

Of course, a hand-written termination letter is always a surprise in this day and age, ...especially when hand-delivered!  That's why our professional teams were surprised to find that this pen serve two utilitarian functions: while being a reliable writing pen, the implement also served well as a defensive weapon when the termination notice was delivered.

Thanks Pentel for making your point with hardened steel!

Our mark - 4 STARS

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Pentel vs. Pilot in our FSRI First Annual Pen-Off Competition!

Want to see which pen holds its own during a merciless corporate testing crucible?  Tune into our next post to find out which brand gets a thumbs up from our scientists and pen-writing experts!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Have a Great Wednesday! And don't forget to leave a fingerprint...!

From everyone here at the FSRI, we wish you a happy and productive Wednesday.  If you can get away from your desk for a moment, come up and say "hi" to Betty in room 59473.  She's the one that runs criminal background checks on all employees, and she'll be glad to take your fingerprint for FSRI internal security purposes.

Also, everyone on the 34th floor, the plumbing department has asked that you refrain from using the toilets due to inexplicable flooding issues.  Use the restrooms on the 47th or 13th floors.

Thank you - Building Management.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Decateur's Weekly Business Roundup

Hey, what's up?  Whatever...

So, it's the middle of the summer and even though most of you are off on vacation and doing whatever it is people do in tents and that kind of thing, I thought I'd do a quick post on what you should be thinking about when you're out there climbing mountains or waterskiing.

GULF OIL SPILL: If you haven't heard, there's a huge spill out in the gulf right now and it ain't gettin' any better.  How will this affect your bottom line?  Don't worry, I've been watching the price of baby oil at the grocery store and it's remained the same throughout this entire disaster.  BOTTOM LINE - overhype.

WORLD CUP SOCCER: Or football, or whatever it is the Estonians call it.  Spain plays Holland this Sunday.  If you don't want to be seen as clueless at work on Monday, watch this game.  Also, if you can, while watching the game, try to pick up a bit on the rules and strategies.  That way you might actually be able to carry on a conversation about it when the subject comes up in the company break room.  Oh, yeah, and if you haven't placed a bet yet, I'm picking Spain in a blowout over the Dutch, 35 to 7.

ECONOMIC RECOVERY: This is the biggest load of bologna I've heard.  Everyone's talking about a crisis, but I don't see it.  Why, you might be asking yourself?  Well, first of all, it's been real rainy here for the last month -- a totally wet and soggy beginning to the summer.  "So, what?"  Well, when it rains grass grows right?  "Right."  And when grass grows people need there lawns mowed right?  "Right." And when people, especially Mrs. Miller, need their lawns mowed I offer to mow their lawns for a fee and consequently can pay my mom rent for my basement apartment and the monthly World of Warcraft membership right?  "RIGHT!"  So this big deal everyone is making about the economy is, as far as I'm concerned, malarky.

For the Hoard,