Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Do I Really Need a Job?

If you don't have a job there are many reasons why you may want to get one. Remember, jobs pay you to do things if you need money, this may be reason enough for you to become employed. Do you have a pile of bills sitting on your coffee table? Has your cable TV been disconnected for some strange reason? Has the recurring dream come back to haunt your sleep ...the one where you are going to pay for your groceries and you go to pull out your money and all you can find is card with the words Faking Smart! on it.

There may be many reasons why you should seek employment. In fact, there may be other people who might want you to have a job. Your parents? Your boyfriend or spouse? Your college loan-provider might even hope that you get up before noon and find a place where you can constructively spend your time. For that matter, a friend may even suggest that you "give up that dream of becoming a blogger" and get yourself gainfully employed. Whatever the reasons, there are clearly many, and trying to argue against it is a valiant attempt at futility.

"Okay," you say. "I'll become a plumber."

That's fine. Go ahead. Nice meeting you, and we at the FSRI wish you the best.

...But hold on! - all those people you see outside your window coming and going to their jobs in corporate America - all those people wearing shirts and ties and sharp-looking business attire ...they look busy and engaged; fervent in their pursuit of the corporate dream and determined to take their next step on the corporate ladder. Isn't this the life we think you should be thinking of? Isn't this the life where the Faking Smart! systems and programs can be put to their best effect?

Of course it is! When you're Faking Smart! you are taking part in an advice scheme that has been tested by multiple labs in multiple and random scenarios. Using NASA monkey research we have come to devise a system with near fail-safe outcome. When you strictly follow the guidlines and you're Faking Smart! in Corporate America, you've got nothing to lose!

The more we talk about how cool it is to work in corporate America the more we know that you know where we think you should be working. (We may expand on this thesis later...) So the decision is clear. Set your alarm for 10 a.m. and get ready for the next stage in our system: Landing the Job. Yes, you need a job and corporate America is where it's at!


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love it! Sounds like you've probably read one too many self-help blogs as well. ;-)

Here in Texas, it is pretty noticeable when the electricity goes. So much for off-grid living in my apartment complex.