Friday, December 28, 2007

A New Year - a New Direction


Everyone here at the FSRI wish you the best and hope your new year is even better than the last!

With the coming year in mind, we here at the FSRI Blogging Division (Spinoza included), look on making a new years resolution. We have decided that we have veered from our original purpose: to expose any and all to the simple virtues of Faking Smart. In the past six months we've made a sincere attempt to do this, but after a series of internal audits we've discovered that we've only managed to show the reader how to successfully reach the stages of the pre-interview phase.

What?, you may ask. It's true. In the six months of this blog's existense we've only gone so far as to describe how to Fake Smart up to the interview portion of your career in corporate America. At this pace it will take us aporoximately two years to actually tell you how what to bring to your first day of work. This is not good.

Starting next month we'll endevour to tell you how to fake smart while at work. Yes!, practical Faking Smart tactics and strategies that you can use right now at the job you currently have!

See you sooon!


Monday, December 24, 2007

Season's Greetings! from the FSRI

Hello, one and all!

As we brave this Holiday season, I wanted to make it clear that neither the FSRI or the FSIHL had anything to do with the inclement weather wrecking havoc on the lives our country's disparate and disjointed masses. That said, I, for one, need snow. I thrive in it, love it, imbibe it ...given it is outside and at a safe distance from the hearth warming my pale blue toes.

Which brings me to the point of this post: happy seasons, or whatever... We here at the FSRI hope your wishes come true, and all that other stuff. Think of others, not yourself 24/7. And do a good deed or two, like putting out your trash and tidying up around the house. "Do this and you will be rewarded" is a message you might find in your fortune cookie eaten at a restaurant open on the 25th. Yes, good Chinese is a celebratory cuisine consumed on this coming day of celebration, especially when you are alone and, or, a practitioner of different faiths.

I, along with my trusty hound, Spinoza, will make do. Even though the offices here at headquarters are vacant, and even though scandal has rocked our intrepid FSRI ship, I will enjoy a quiet Holiday here at the office and I want to make sure no one out there is worried about me. Go about your business ...I'm safe and sound, no worse for wear. Please, I'm fine, and I'm serious when I tell you this. Ah, wait, who is it ringing me on my cellphone? ...My good friend Mustafa Bey, the Sultan of Istanbul! He's invited me to a party. See! I'm fine. One quick cab-ride to the airport and "presto," I'm in business!

Which brings me to further business: the work on the first Faking Smart! book is in progress. No date, as of yet; the other good news, my ghost-writer and stalwart friend, Martin Fossum, is soon to be finished with his compelation of short fiction ...and when it's available I'll post a link for it here on the site.

Happy Holidays, from myself and Spinoza,


Thursday, December 6, 2007

Happy Holidays, etc...

Today we're going to talk about interviewing strategies; particularly, how to communicate with a company who calls you to set up an interview.

...Ah, who am I kidding? I haven't posted in over a month and I suppose I have some explaining to do. You see, things here at the FSRI have been a little rough-going as of late. Sure, we could have ridden through the debacle involving Hendersen and Ella. (...According to Ella, Hendersen forcibly relocated our innocent and pure VP of Media Relations to Oslo where she was apparently subjected to all means of torture and mistreatment - weekend skiing-gjoring, northern light viewing, cuddly snow-drift love-making, etc...) We'll have you know that her tourism visa expired and she's back safely at FSRI headquarters where she's teaching us all how to knit mittens. But this was the least of our problems.

Following the abrupt disappearance of Ella and Hendersen, Decateur lapsed into a dark in nearly irretrievable depression. He barricaded himself in the employee lounge and made painful and uncharacteristic demands such as insisting that we feed him delivery pizza and pad-thai from the Thai Palace. Continuing his rampage over our good will, he insisted upon opening a netflicks account, getting broadband for his participation in World of Warcraft gaming while requiring that we deliver cases of diet Mug Rootbeer to his door. A dark weekend it was...!

With Decateur on the path to full recovery (he is currently warded in the FSRI video game addiction and root-beer obsession division...) we thought our troubles were over and that we could return to posting on a regular basis. Not the case! Just when things seemed fine Dutch authorities raided our East Indies FSRI offices charging us with illegal dissemination of illicit and superficial intelligence. I am writing you from Brussels ready to answer to a world court judge on the global threat that FSRI may or may not pose. But don't worry, if their case has a flaw, our FSRI attorneys will shred it to pieces. And shred they will!

As our ordeal proceeds here in lovely Europe, I'll make it clear that we are trying with all concert and deliberation to deliver you more content. But, content yourselves with this limited content. And don't expect daily posts - be reasonable and give up some time. In addition to resolving our European legal disputes and posting on this blog, we are trying to get together a published form for our Faking Smart in Corporate America book. Yes, your eyes are not fooling you. A Faking Smart book for any and all to buy!

Cheerio, all, and I'll give you a tidbit of Faking Smart wisdom as time permits.