Sunday, January 30, 2011

FSRI DISCLOSES CONTROVERSIAL DATA ON WORKPLACE HUMOR

Once in a while the FSRI likes to make public the results of some of its ongoing research.  Our goal in publishing these results is to broaden public awareness of the important issues and topics facing the business sector, and by doing so facilitate and effect change.  To be clear, the FSRI is in no way attempting to interpret this data.  The goal in our research is simply to produce data and let others come to their individual and varied conclusions.

RESULTS OF OUR LATEST RESEARCH ON HUMOR AT THE WORKPLACE:


1.  A PROMOTION CAUSES AN EMPLOYEE TO LOSE 13.7269% (ON AVERAGE) OF HIS OR HER SENSE OF HUMOR.  THE EFFECTS ARE CUMULATIVE OVER THE LIFETIME OF THE EMPLOYEE.*


2.  BUSINESS EMPLOYEES ARE PURCHASING FEWER AND FEWER HUMOR BOOKS OVER THE SPAN OF THEIR CAREERS.


3.  PURCHASING BUSINESS HUMOR BOOKS IS A GREAT WAY TO IMPROVE WORKPLACE PRODUCTIVITY.


4.  71. 834% OF LIFE COACHES AND MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKERS HAVE COMPLETELY LOST THEIR SENSES OF HUMOR.*

Thanks for looking at these numbers.  Use this data responsibly and don't drink and drive while viewing this data.

(* The margin of error is 98%)

Thanks and good luck!
KWA

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Decateur Resigns as FSRI Chief of Staff

Bogota, Colombia - The FSRI announced today that Decateur Thoms, FSRI consultant and recently appointed FSRI Chief of Staff, has resigned.  The reasons given for the resignation were provided by Ella Foster, VP of Media Relations.  "Decateur's resignation came as a result of time conflicts associated with the position. Apparently, Mr. Thoms finds it difficult to get up before 10:30 a.m. for our regular Monday briefings..."


"That's not true," insisted Mr. Thoms during a telephone interview conducted late last night from his apartment in S.E. Wisconsin. "It's just that I had stuff going on last Sunday and I lost track of time.  I got to bed real late. That's all.  Whatever, dude..."


At the time of the writing of this article, Karl Wolfbrooks Ager was unreachable for comment.



Wednesday, January 12, 2011

FAKING SMART! the book IS NOW AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE!

I'm sure many of you have been waiting for this... and, at last, here it is.  The book is available on CREATSPACE right now, and should be up on Amazon.com in the next few days or so.  Thanks for being out there... (wink).  By buying this book you support the FSRI, the FSIHL and and most of all, your beloved author.  Many years have gone into this production.  Hopefully it will be read and appreciated!


This book contains completely new content - none of which has been printed in this blog...



KWA

Faking Smart! Get Hired, Get Promoted and Become a V.P. in Six Short Weeks - GUARANTEED!




Sunday, January 9, 2011

Wolfbrooks Hires Decateur Thoms as Chief of Staff...

Bern, Switzerland - The FSRI announced early today from its Bern headquarters that Karl Wolfbrooks Ager has made his new pick for the vacated position of the FSRI Chief of Staff.  Decateur Thoms will be filling the position, it was said.  Mr. Thoms was not immediately available for comment.  Thoms has been a long-standing servant to Wolfbrooks and the FSRI and it came as no surprise that he emerged as the leading pick for the post.  Thoms will continue to fulfill his former duties at the FSRI until a replacement for his past position is found.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

AGER RETURNS FROM EAST COAST TRIP..

Seattle, WA. - Karl Wolfbrooks Ager returned yesterday from a moderately secret trip to the U.S. East Coast where he claims to have visited friends and relatives.  According to the FSRI he will presently resume his normal work schedule and address the imminent hiring of a new Chief of Staff.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

The FSRI Would Like to Wish All of You a Happy New Year...



Yes, it's true, the FSRI would like to wish all of you a happy New Year.


As we flip over the calendar in this annual ritual, it's a perfect time to reflect on the events of the past year and to look forward to those that await.  It's a time to be thankful of all that we have... and a time to set new goals and to hope for greater things, for both ourselves and others, to greet us in the future.


With this in mind, making a New Year's resolution becomes a perfect way of heralding in the new annum.  We recommend that you adopt one or more of the following resolutions to help you reach your fullest potential.


FSRI-RECOMMENDED NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS:


1.  "I will stop letting the air out of my neighbor's tires."
2.  "I will try to compost more."
3.  "I will not look for the fresher milk in the back of the row of cartons."
4.  "I will get to work on time... more often."
5.  "I will not make unnecessary Facebook comments."
6.  "I will refine and become more knowledgable about my political positions."
7.  "I will stop intimidating co-workers with my intellect."
8.  "I will be kinder toward and more trusting of my auto mechanic."
9.  "I will be more effective at branding myself."
10.  "I will read self-help books with guarded skepticism."


Voila!  There you have it, a number of resolutions that the FSRI has found to be valid and legitimate.  Remember, don't worry if you can't decide on a resolution right away.  Take you time to pick out the one that is right for you!


Good luck!
KWA